"Parenting Our Parents"

I saw another article in the Vancouver Sun Friday , talking about parenting one's parents.

Well, I know that is how it feels. But...........

It is important to remember that one is not "parenting our parents"when we do eldercare. We are caring for people who are becoming frail, who are perhpas losing memory, who are, well, becoming disabled. They are adults with disabilties.

What does one versus the other do?

The first concept leads to infantilzation. It leads to "making decisions for," rather than "making decisions with." It leads to talking about someone when they are in the room, as if they are not there.

The latter means including someone in care planning. It means making sure they have the dignity that all adults have. it is about approach. It means appropriate boundaries, a difficult thing at the best of times.