Eldercare, Aging, and Nutrition

Okay, so the title is a lie. This has nothing to do with eldercare. But someone sent these to me, I don't know who wrote them, I thought they were funny, and my sanity was wilting about now.............

HEALTH QUESTION & ANSWER SESSION

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?
A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?
A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.


Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?
A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?
A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?
A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!!. Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?
A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?
A: Are you crazy? HELLO . Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around.

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

Q: Is getting in-shape important for my lifestyle?
A: Hey! 'Round' is a shape!Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride!"

Older People Are Not Pets

This is kind of part two of the previous post. Maybe they should be called Marketing Department People 1 and 2. Anyway, just so you are not confused.

I visit a lot of facilities. I meet a lot of Marketing People. For some reason they have all been women. Usually ones with soft voices and smiles.

I watch them as they interact with the residents. They get hugsy and smily. Sometiems they get gushy. But I wonder, when I watch, is there really respect there about the people to whom they are providing service. A sense of respect based on understanding who these people are and what their needs are.

Their jobs are to marekt, to sell. Sometimes that can conflict. It is the genuineness that I look for.

It is easy to be gushy and smily with people who are fragile. It is like dealing with any disabled person and not really acknowledging them, and dealing with them as equals.

I looked up respect in my Websters Unified Dictonary and Encyclopaedia. I was a little worried when I started looking because it is an old (1954) dictionary (although I suppose rspectwas around back in 1954--probably more so than now but anyway...) and I opened it up to find that someone had cut out a big hole in the middle pages to make a hiding place for page . From page 2996 (non-resident to north) up to page 3674 (Rosetta to Ross, Sir John) most of the middle of each page was gone.

Fortunately, "respect " is still there. The first definition says, "to hold in high esteem, to have regard for, as, to respect rights of others. ""

Respect does not mean hugs and kisses that look something like the way one pet's ones dog. Respect means acknowledging a personhood, a history, an ability to see and show that one sees, who someone is. Respect can be difficult, because it is easy t o discount people when they are disabled

Now, don't get your knickers in a knot here. I am not dissing marekting people as a group, or as individuals, per se. I have really enjoyed meeting many of them, and have often found them to be warm and fun people . I am also not saying don't hug, don't touch. I think the world would be a better place if we touched in a loving, caring way more often. I am just saying that if we really look at how we offer respect to older, frail, or disabled people, I think it would look much different.

And in care you are wondering:

non resiednt: "One who does not reside in a specific place."

Ross, Sir John: "1777-1856, Br. explorer In 1818 attempteed to find the N.W. Passage. In 1829, he tried again in a paddle steamer and was ice bound for three yrs. In 1835 he wrote the Narrative of a Second Voyage in Search of a North West Passage. " Well, give the guy credit for trying.

Quality of Care Vs. Marketing of Care

I called a care /assisted living complex the other day for a client and asked for some update on info about their services and avaiability. I happened to ask if they had a social worker. The woman, head of marketing, told me that they don't have one anymore--they used to , and they are "looking at it again."

Then she told me that have have looked at their competitors in their price bracket and those facilities don't have a social worker either.

Then she told me (not all of this in the same order) that they charge about $300.00 more per month than similar facilities because they do so much more in helping their residents get to programmes and so on.

Then she went on a spiel about how important socializing is for everyone.

Then she insinuated that they don't need a social worker because they have people like her and a recreation department.

Beware of marketing people when you go to see facilities. Their job is to sell you something, not help you figure out what you need and/ or what your loved one and you need. They are often not trained in geriatrics. Only one place have I every been where the person who gave me a tour, was trained ( Augustine House, in Ladner).

I wanted to tell her that Social Work has an important role to play in care and meeting the emotional needs of residents and family memebers. Having done it for many years in many facilities, I know it is a unique role. I also know that more often than not, nursing directors will tell you that, once they have had a Social Worker, they appreciate the value of the role in the facility.

I thought it was also interesting that she talked about what her competitors were doing ( she wouldn't tell me who they were). She didn't tell me about her company's evaluation of what good care is about (Indirectly, I suppose she was telling me, I suppose). What she was saying is that the company was making first an economic decision, not a care based decision. It also made me wonder if she and the company have a real understanding of the needs of their clients.

I would think twice about if I want my clients in a facility where care is not a first priority.

10 Reasons to HIre a Geriatric Care Manager

10. We can do in 2 hours what it would take you 2 weeks to do.

9. We know how to get around that “I’m saving for a rainy
day” syndrome, when your folks are drowning in their problems.

8. We’re much cheaper than the cost of plane fare if you have
to fly into town when your parents say “everything is fine”
but you know it isn’t.

7. We can give you the scoop on which nursing home is really
right for your parents.

6. We can make your parents hear what you have said over and
over again, but they refuse to listen because to them, you are
still a child.

5. We can tell your annoying sibling to shut up, but graciously.

4. We’ve helped hundreds of families a lot worse than yours.

3. Your dad can’t push our buttons.

2. Next time you want to hang up on your mother, you can tell
her to call us.

1. We’re available 24/7, so you don’t have to be.

(Reprinted from "Inside GCM'" Winter, 2005, Vol 16:1)

We Are Their Dreamers

I was in a care conference last week. The woman we were discussing is 92, soft spoken, with a sadness that moves with her like a blanket. She used to be a musician, in a band. When I saw her last, she was sitting on her bed in her little room in the nursing home where she lives. There is not much on the walls; when I see that I wonderif it is areflection of her life. There is a picture , and on her shelf a photo of her self with her husband, and one of her son. Everything is all right she told me. She doesn't go to the activities--they don't interest her. What would you really like to do? I asked her.

Play some more in a band.

I brought it up in the conference. I said I don't know how we could do it--maybe we can find her a band, or some musicians who would play, some people who just like to get together and who would find a place for her.

No, I was told. Do you know how hard it is to find people? To find a band? To find gigs. It wasn't possible.

I didn't know what to say to them. Somehow, I let it go. I think now that I deserted her.

I thought of her on her bed, waiting, wanting to play, and I thought, that is how she feels, that it isn't possible. And I know why she has her sadness. It is the loss of hope, the loss of purpose, the loss of dreams.

Today, several days later, I realized what those of us who work in Eldercare, in Nursing Homes are.

We are more than advocates, more than providers of quality of care. We are more than caring people.

Whenever and wherever possible, we need to go beyond what we think at first isn't possible, because so often, that is where the people we are caring for are too.

We are their dreamers.